What I use: Hair Edition


You might have noticed that I’ve tried and loved a lot of high-end makeup, skincare, and body care (thanks to winnings and free samples). But guess what? I still use drugstore products. This post will be the first in a series of what I use for hair, skin (face & body), and makeup. Hairing is caring, isn’t it?

Since growing out my naturally curly hair (without permanently straightening it) I have looked for a cheaper line of hair care that works just as well as the more expensive stuff (available only online or in hair salons). I think the Damage Eraser line is it.

I buy in bulk (especially when the Damage Eraser line is available on sale):


Though they discontinued the hair mask that I love from their Triple Nutrition line, Garnier is still really good for curly hair. The Damage eraser line has a hair butter in it (cupuacu butter) that saturates curls and leaves them very supple. What you’re left with is curly hair that looks its best (and smells really good too). Here’s a closer look at each product:

Damage Eraser Fortifying Shampoo


This washes without drying out your curls and it leaves your scalp feeing fresh and clean.

Damage Eraser Fortifying Conditioner    


This one is good for leaving in your hair for 5 or 6 minutes and then rinsing it out.

Damage Eraser Split End Bandage


I use this all over my hair (after washing) and it leaves my hair very soft and light. Its not at all heavy (it has a milk-like consistency).

Damage Eraser Strength Reconstructing Butter


This is a double-duty one for me. 1. hair mask  2. curl’s are up in a bun and need to be let free conditioner (but only a small amount rubbed between the hands and worked into my hair).

Herbal Essences Oil Elixir


I like this for conditioning my scalp and for the tips of my hair (smells amazing too).

Live Clean Argan Oil Leave-In Conditioning Spray


I use it to perk up my curls when my hair is down. It’s light, moisturizing, and very good for curly hair (which doesn’t need to be crisped up with a heavy synthetic spray).

Look forward to more posts on hair, skincare, makeup, and food too!


Remember If You Love Somebody


My thoughts on reunions and new beginnings are really simple: where there is a will there is a way and its better to try and make contact however you can. Life is still too short to worry about what mistakes you made yesterday (especially when tomorrow is something we may or may not wake up to), and yesterday is living in the past. I talk about the abuse I went through, not to live in hate, but to help people get better for themselves in their life. Sharings about my thoughts on leadership, body image, naysayers, If You Love Somebody & If You Care About Growth & Family are meant to help people have what really matters – good people around them.

I want meaningful relationships: people you can count on, no matter what, and people who don`t expect you to be perfect or have all the answers to every question – those are the sort of people who matter to me. That`s why, in doing these kind of posts, i`ve encounters those in support and those against anything I have to say about growth and reunions and following your dreams.

We only get one chance in this world (as we are) but we have more than one chance to get it right with who we connect the most with, and those who we believe and know are meant to be in our life. It`s the season of new beginnings, and I hope everyone is with me in hoping that we all hear from people who might of dropped off out radar for a time (and that we hold onto them when they come back). Its time to give of ourselves (as that`s the only way to live).

— Adaora

Here I am


I have a lot of things planned (for this blog and on my Youtube – see my media page for a link) and here they are:

  1. More recipes
  2. Booktube
  3. A blog layout overhaul (because its good to switch things up while keeping what works and disposing of what doesn’t fit.)
  • Adaora

The Unexpected Love

Me and my little brother Ike (old picture)

He will be 12 years old this coming weekend (I can’t believe it!), and it feels like I met him just yesterday:

Ike and my guitar (which unfortunately I had to leave when I left abuse)

Here are 12 Ike likes:

1. Writing

2.  Reading books

3. Sketching and drawing

4. Math & science

5. Eating mac & cheese

6. Friends

7.  Music

8. The guitar

9.  Dora The Explorer

10. Computer games

11. Home renovation and interior design

12. His big sister Adaora

Considering the age he’s about to be, I guess I can’t call him my little baby any more.

– Adaora


I have been hit, slapped, yanked, pulled (by both ears), dragged across the floor, beaten, held in choke hold, threatened, and made afraid to go ‘home.’ I have been abused for pretty much my entire life. I am a victim of abuse and I don’t care if everybody knows because I want to help somebody.

Abuse is scary: for a long time, you find yourself believing that the horror you go through (from being yelled at, name-called, slapped, hit, dragged, held in a choke hold or beaten) is no big deal; all I’ve known, for my entire life, is abuse. He and she abused me physically, verbally, emotionally, psychologically, and financially.

My abuser and my abuser (in a rage) both thought and acted for themselves: as a result of being in and around normalcy, one of my abusers tried to pass his abuse history onto me: I refused; I kicked, screamed, shouted ‘no more,’ and I made him more angry in my refusal to become like him. My other abuser (who had been painful to me in their own way) was cruel in their own way too.  Abusers are so consumed with themselves and how they look to other people (and how people bow down to them), that they can’t take five minutes to remember that there are other people in the house who have feelings too. 

Every single article, where I have talked about not wasting any time reconnecting, surrounding yourself with family, loving yourself and knowing your worth, why I get to love my body, why I love my body, impacts on the familyand praying for me have all been my way of cautioning you against abuse. I have always told myself (since deciding that I want to have kids) that when I have nieces, nephews, and kids of my own, I would do my best to be friends with their friends and the parents of their friends (my husband and I), and that they would know that our home is home for them too. I wish I had and how to stop it. I know that when I have nieces, nephews, I hope that everyone would raise their kids in a home where (if they have the room/if they don’t think they do) their kids can say “you can come home with me” and they do.


Hearing & Listening

Its really important to understand the difference between hearing and listening: hearing is when you sit within ‘human hearing range’ of another person (whether they’re a ‘loved one’ or someone you work with), and you are able to use formal or informal education gathered to grasp a hearing of what another person is saying verbally.  Listening is more important: listening means you care (in some way) about the person speaking; it means you are prepared to stop, look, and actually listen (as in hear and understand what they have to say). Listening is about compromise: as much as you want to talk the ear off of another person, (whether or not you love them), listening requires a message to be sent and received (its a two person deal). Whether or not you love a person, you need to speak, stop, listen, and understand both ways. When you love somebody you are sharing conversation and feelings, and you have to love them enough to sit back and say “tell me how you feel, genuinely,” or “I think I want to hear, from you, anything that matters to you (because your voice matters to me.”) I have spoken about this before (perhaps not here), but its as simple as this: you cannot claim to love somebody if you are not willing to take the time to get to know them intimately. Knowing someone intimately is not just sexual thing, its personal too: value systems, general thoughts, feelings, dealings in life….what and who matters to someone (you say you love) is all understood and known (as part of who they are) when you close your mouth, open your ears, and listen.


We all have a voice, and it’s important that we are given room to listen; if someone stutters around you, it means that you are rushing them: they don’t feel like you will give them the necessary time needed to collect their thoughts, put them together, and explain them in a way that they feel will make sense to you. When you love somebody, you give them that time: giving of yourself is when you understand that in order to have human connections, giving, in the way that I am speaking of it now, is a very important sharing of yourself that cannot be bought (be it with slushy drinks, trinkets, or other ‘things’ that are creature comforts or tastes). They can only be felt with a listening ear and an open heart (because they are matters of the heart).

If you really love who you say you love, as I have spoken about in my posts on family and loving, then you ought to take the time to close your mouth, open up both your ears, and listen.

– A